Understanding Elliot Isherwood's Counselling Approach: What to Expect and Who can Benefit

As children grow up they are often encouraged to listen to teachers, doctors, parents and experts. Subsequently, children usually view adults as having all the answers, but as children become adults themselves they often realize that being an adult is not much different from being a child. The main difference from being a child to an adult is having more responsibilities. Eventually, a child turning into an adult finds themself in a position where they are no longer cared for but, instead, are responsible for caring for others, including themselves.

In our modern world with Google always at our fingertips to immediately answer questions and experts only a call or email away like our GPs, mechanics and handymen, we often look towards others to solve our own problems. This is all very well regarding aspects such as medicine or car parts but when it comes to mental health there is no better expert about us than ourselves. On one hand this is great as it suggests that we have everything we need within to help ourselves. On the other hand, we are the only ones who can make meaningful change. Just as one cannot ask someone else to get into shape for them, it is impossible to ask others to improve their own mental health. 

Yet, if we truly are our own experts then why do we still experience mental health issues? There could be many reasons, not least a lack of trust with ourselves as being our own experts. It is possible one could have learnt to not trust in themself or be confused with what the need after listening to different opinions from friends, family and partners. For example, if someone lives only to please others they might not be in-tune with what they themselves really need. If one does not know what they need they would not be able to actively get it and still would feel like they are missing something important. Not understanding yourself is often what is worked on in counselling, which when achieved grants the client access to a pool of wisdom they can use to help improve their mental health day by day.

During Elliot’s counselling sessions he implements the Person-Centred approach created by the late Carl Rogers. With this approach Elliot strives for unconditional positive regard - which is the act of valuing the client as a person even if he disagrees with the clients behaviour. Elliot attempts to unconditionally accept the client as a person with respect. This could be the first time for the individual and they might act defensively and even aggressively in response as they might have learnt to actively mistrust others. But only through unconditional positive regard can the client truly trust the counsellor and be open to sharing. Through unconditional positive regard, the counsellor “earns the right” to see past the walls of the client which then allows for progress to be made (Mearns & Thorne, 1999).

Another strategy that Elliot implements in his counselling is Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT). CBT focuses on the relationship between thoughts, feelings and behaviour and aims to challenge thoughts that are no longer helpful (Branch & Willson, 2010). It challenges thoughts that are maladaptive (no longer serving a good purpose or actively hurting) through logic, looking at evidence including past experiences and questions asked by the counsellor. For example, a person may believe “I am the worst person in the world, I am unlovable”. Through careful discussion the client may reveal that they have been given some compliments this week by their boss and they recently received lots of birthday cards from family showing that they are indeed loved. This challenges their belief and they might realise that they are loved and become even more open to receiving it and noticing it in the future. The main principle of CBT is that through challenging maladaptive thoughts, the behaviour subsequently is changed. 

One more aspect of Elliot’s counselling sessions to be discussed today are the resources provided and coaching. Only when we know better can we do better. At the end of some sessions Elliot will provide a summary sheet of topics discussed, as well as vocabulary used (with definitions), activities shared such as breathing techniques to reduce anxiety, stories shared that were impactful to the client and/or whatever else was useful. The counselling session is not a memory test and so it is important for Elliot that the client is able to remind themselves of what was discussed and help them access that support whenever they need it. These sheets vary with content but always seek to summarise and can be a source of knowledge beyond the 1-1 counselling sessions. This empowers the client to help themselves beyond the counselling sessions and inspires clients to take their mental health into their own hands.

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